July 2012
2 posts
7 tags
Edie and Pop Ep. 6: Baby Dentures
EDIE: Pop! I saw a baby yesterday and he had teeth. I need some of those.
POP: You’re only three months old. You won’t get teeth for a while.
EDIE: But gums are so newborn! I want some chompers.
POP: Well, I’m sorry. Teeth are fickle. There’s no way to tell when they’ll come in. It might be in three months or in a year.
EDIE: How do you know this...
6 tags
Edie and Pop Ep. 5: Freelance Dream Warrior
EDIE: Pop! Pop! Pop!
POP: What’s up? What’s wrong?
EDIE: I had a bad dream!
POP: Oh, Edie, I’m so sorry. I wish there was…hold on. Why are you texting me this? Why aren’t you just crying?
EDIE: It’s called the 21st century, Pop. Real emotions expressed through human to human contact is archaic. Only what we convey electronically is of...
June 2012
5 posts
6 tags
Edie and Pop Ep. 4: The Haves and...
EDIE: Pop. I need some money.
POP: Nope. You do not. Because you are a baby.
EDIE: That’s bigotry. You’re a baby bigot.
POP: Even if I gave you money how would you get to a store?
EDIE: You will carry me there.
POP: Fat chance, fat baby.
EDIE: You can’t say those things. I could be scarred for life.
POP: No, you won’t. Your memory sucks. Every time...
7 tags
Edie and Pop Ep. 3: Two Can Play at this Crying...
EDIE: Pop, Pop, Pop.
POP: Hey, I’m trying to sleep. Remember how you were up all night?
EDIE: Yeah, that was a great time. Tonight? Same time?
POP: No. You’re going to sleep no matter what. I will build a fake womb to put you back in if that’s what it takes.
EDIE: Oh, my gosh. I totally miss that place. It was like a temperature controlled dance club with flesh...
7 tags
Edie and Pop Ep. 2: In Case of Emergency, Break...
EDIE: Pop. It’s me, Edie. Your seven week old daughter.
POP: Are you texting me again? How did you get your Mom’s phone AGAIN?
EDIE: Oh, she left it in the crib when I started holding it and cooing. She’s such a sucker. Where are you?
POP: I’m at my desk. I’m literally 15 feet from you.
EDIE: Oh, thanks for rubbing it in. I’m practically blind...
6 tags
Edie and Pop Ep. 1: Texting While Drooling
EDIE: Hey, pop. It’s Edie.
POP: Is this a joke? How are you texting?
EDIE: I have Mom’s phone. Don’t worry about it. What’s up?
POP: I’m working. So I can keep you in diapers.
EDIE: Cool. Come home.
POP: I can’t. That’s the problem with NOT BEING A BABY. You have to work.
EDIE: That suuuuucks. But I want to play.
POP: You’re six...
